Tell Us About Yourself(ie): Demetri Martin

Ilya S. Savenok / Getty. Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed

What's the wallpaper on your phone and/or computer?

It’s a list I made that has these words on it: “script, story, essay, jokes, drawings”. I put it there so that when I look at my phone it can remind me of what I should be working on.

When you walk into a bar, what do you typically order?

People around (quietly, in my mind).

What's the one word you are guilty of using too often?

Hm…

What is the last thing you searched for on Google?

This answer.

Who is the last person that called or texted you?

Me. I sometimes text jokes or other ideas to myself. I usually carry a small notebook to write things down in, but sometimes I forget the notebook. When that happens I use my phone and text the joke or idea to myself.

What was the last awkward situation you were in and how did you handle it?

Law school. I dropped out.

When is the last time you went to a theater?

About 2 weeks ago to do a show.

Larry Busacca / Getty. Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed

What TV show should everyone be watching?

A brand new standup comedy special on Netflix called “Demetri Martin: Live (At the time)”.

And what is your TV guilty pleasure?

Turning it on.

What's the first CD you bought?

I don’t remember exactly, but when I bought it I remember thinking to myself, “This is a very cool CD to be buying as my first CD.”

What music are you currently listening to?

I’m playing a set of bagpipes right now.

What is the one food you cannot resist?

I know I’ve gained a little weight, but that’s not appropriate.

What movie makes you laugh the most?

- I don’t know. But one that I can think of that makes me laugh as much now as it did when I first saw it as a child is The Pink Panther Strikes Again starring Peter Sellers.

What drives you absolutely crazy?

Being shot out of a cannon.

What's your favorite day of the year?

Hm…

What was your first online screen name?

Demetrimartin

Imeh Akpanudosen / Getty. Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed

What's your favorite emoji?

Actual words.

Pick one: Kittens or puppies?

No thanks. I’m not hungry.

New York or Los Angeles?

Or.

Comedy or drama?

I can’t tell the difference anymore.

Coffee or tea?

Sure.

'80s or '90s?

I hope to live even longer than that.

And finally: tell us a secret.

When I answered that other question earlier about music I wasn’t really playing the bagpipes. I was just holding them.

Demetri Martin. Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed

Demetri Martin: LIVE (At the Time) is streaming now on Netflix.